Category Archives: Venting

Cool mom vs happy mom

I’ve always thought I wanted to be the cool mom. Maybe it’s because I feel like I need to try to make people like me. Maybe it’s because I think Rylan would want to have a cool mom. But I had a recent experience that made me care much less about being the cool mom.
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Love is Not Enough

I’ve been struggling a bit with missing my ex lately. I can’t seem to get rid of the desire to get back with him, even if I know it would be a bad idea. I think that maybe it’s that I don’t feel happy with my life and I think he could fix that. Well, honestly, I know he could. Continue reading

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Just a Rant

I was talking to two of my uncles about school and told them I was changing my major to German. Both of them bluntly told me that I was going for a “useless degree” and I’d be better off with a degree in “underwater basket weaving”. I tried to stick up for myself, I told them that this is something I enjoy, that I’m passionate about I also told them I was going to minor in business or teaching. Still, they reassured me that it was useless. I know their intentions were well meaning, but fuck shoot, what happened to “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”?

I am a intelligent and mature woman. It’s like they assumed I’m just blindly changing my major. But, I have spent hours upon hours looking into job possibilities for a German major. I’ve checked the salaries and I know I won’t get rich with this major. I might even end up at some low end job and work towards a second bachelors degree. And I am okay with that. Because this is my life and my dream.

All in all, I’m just tired of the negativity I deal with so often. Most of us are just trying to do our best in this complex crazy life. We need to give each other a break and be nice for a change. Give advice instead of being condescending. Be supportive instead of judgmental. Oh how this world could be a much better place.

Thanks for listening reading. Much love! Xx

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Emotions and Money

Since I no longer am on Facebook two-faced-book the only place I have left to vent my emotions is here. Or I guess to my family, but I think they’ve heard enough lately.. Maybe I should just keep a personal journal.. But then the chances of relating to someone are diminished to nothing. ::sigh:: I’ll just write on here for now.

A month or so ago I was budgeting my money super well. I managed to spend around $200 a month on groceries and resisted I plucks spending. But since a few things have happened and I’ve been down and stressed my budget has gone out the window. I’ve been buying so many things I don’t even need and spending money I don’t have. So far this month I have spent over $300 on groceries. That’s insane! And now I’m sitting here beating myself up about it and feeling stupid.. On top of that I’ve purchased some books for Rylan and I, bought some patio decorations and furniture, and spent way too much on Wendy’s French fries and fresh lemonade (omg yum).. All these things make me feel good when I buy them, but now I’m left feeling absolutely horrible and full of regret.

I need to get back on the budgeting wagon and stop relying on buying things to make me feel better. I feel a need for support, someone to kick me when I think of buying something I don’t need, but I know of no-one. What do you do when you feel you lack support? I can’t just make a quick friend and ask them to help me keep to my budget like 2 days after meeting them. Pretty sure they would think I was a little strange.

Who knows, maybe I’ll start blogging about my budgeting troubles and successes.

Anyways, thanks for reading! I would love to hear any ideas you have for getting back on the budgeting wagon or finding support. Xx

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